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Things I Wanted To Say (But Never Did)

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Whit Lancaster burst into my life like a storm. Dark and thunderous, furious and fierce. Cold, heartless and devastatingly beautiful, like the statues in our prep school gardens. The school with his family name on the sign. He can do no wrong here. This is his domain. He’s a menace on campus. Adored and feared. Hated and respected. His taunting words carve into my skin, sh Whit Lancaster burst into my life like a storm. Dark and thunderous, furious and fierce. Cold, heartless and devastatingly beautiful, like the statues in our prep school gardens. The school with his family name on the sign. He can do no wrong here. This is his domain. He’s a menace on campus. Adored and feared. Hated and respected. His taunting words carve into my skin, shredding me to ribbons. Yet his intense gaze scorches my blood, fills me with a longing I don’t understand. When I stumble upon him one night alone, I find him broken. Bleeding. My instincts scream to leave and let him suffer, but I can’t. I sneak him into my room. Clean him up. Fall for his lies. Let him possess every single part of me until I’m the one left a gasping, broken mess. When he leaves me alone in the dead of night, he takes my journal with him. Now he knows all my secrets. My hate. My truth. And he promises to use my words against me. I’ll be ruined if my darkest secret gets out. That’s when I strike a bargain with the devil. I’ll let Whit Lancaster ruin me behind closed doors instead.


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Whit Lancaster burst into my life like a storm. Dark and thunderous, furious and fierce. Cold, heartless and devastatingly beautiful, like the statues in our prep school gardens. The school with his family name on the sign. He can do no wrong here. This is his domain. He’s a menace on campus. Adored and feared. Hated and respected. His taunting words carve into my skin, sh Whit Lancaster burst into my life like a storm. Dark and thunderous, furious and fierce. Cold, heartless and devastatingly beautiful, like the statues in our prep school gardens. The school with his family name on the sign. He can do no wrong here. This is his domain. He’s a menace on campus. Adored and feared. Hated and respected. His taunting words carve into my skin, shredding me to ribbons. Yet his intense gaze scorches my blood, fills me with a longing I don’t understand. When I stumble upon him one night alone, I find him broken. Bleeding. My instincts scream to leave and let him suffer, but I can’t. I sneak him into my room. Clean him up. Fall for his lies. Let him possess every single part of me until I’m the one left a gasping, broken mess. When he leaves me alone in the dead of night, he takes my journal with him. Now he knows all my secrets. My hate. My truth. And he promises to use my words against me. I’ll be ruined if my darkest secret gets out. That’s when I strike a bargain with the devil. I’ll let Whit Lancaster ruin me behind closed doors instead.

30 review for Things I Wanted To Say (But Never Did)

  1. 4 out of 5

    ♂️Must Have Book Boyfriends ♂️

    “My own personal whore, to use however I like, whenever I want. It’ll be fun, Savage. I’ll fuck you in every hole you’ve got. And you’ll take it. Willingly.” I HAVE A NEW FAVE DIRTY, DEPRAVED ALPHA ASSHOLE BOOK BOYFRIEND IN MY LIFE AND I'M NEVER GIVING HIM UP! EVER!!! Whit IS ONE OF THE BIGGEST AHOLES I'VE EVER MET AND I F'N LOVE HIM. Oh my goddddamnnn! 🥵 And I swear he's also one of the dirtiest talkers I've read from Monica. JFC!!! I didn't want this book to end!!! This book is my jam!!! M “My own personal whore, to use however I like, whenever I want. It’ll be fun, Savage. I’ll fuck you in every hole you’ve got. And you’ll take it. Willingly.” I HAVE A NEW FAVE DIRTY, DEPRAVED ALPHA ASSHOLE BOOK BOYFRIEND IN MY LIFE AND I'M NEVER GIVING HIM UP! EVER!!! Whit IS ONE OF THE BIGGEST AHOLES I'VE EVER MET AND I F'N LOVE HIM. Oh my goddddamnnn! 🥵 And I swear he's also one of the dirtiest talkers I've read from Monica. JFC!!! I didn't want this book to end!!! This book is my jam!!! MY JAM!!!! And omg he told he totally took her 🍑💦 and it was PERFECTION. I am literally obsessed with this fucker! I could not get enough of Whit! The things that came out of his mouth were so messed up, I found myself saying "WHAT THE FUCK DID HE JUST SAY OMG GIMME MORE!!!!" I found myself craving more of his dickish, twisted ways. What the hell does that say about me? I am ADDICTED to Whit! This is seriously one of my fave enemies-to-lovers romances I've ever read. I don't often do bully romances either, but I can honestly say this was written SO WELL, it was LEGIT perfection. And don't get me started on the angst! NEXT. FUCKING. LEVEL. It kept me turning the pages. I wanted to throw my kindle so many goddamn times! THIS IS WHAT I CRAVE IN ROMANCE! I will never be over this love story! I'll be re-reading this soon! Things I Wanted To Say by Monica Murphy is LIVE! AMAZON US: https://amzn.to/3xGmZV7 AMAZON CA: https://amzn.to/3eecNvQ UNIVERSAL: mybook.to/TIWTS

  2. 5 out of 5

    you nicknamed my daughter after the

    💅🏽😌 4.5 STARS 😌💅🏽 Did I inhale this 600+ page book in around 4 hours whilst also dragging hala along with me for the ride? The correct answer is yes but I didn't just inhale it. I lived it, devoured it, and choked on it. Why you ask? All because of one man and one man only. Whit Lancaster “I think you’d like it if I wrapped my hands around your throat and choked the life out of you. Knowing I was the last face you ever saw.” -the way my pussy just throbbED... HOW IS THIS FAIR I WANT ONE 👄 SPOIL 💅🏽😌 4.5 STARS 😌💅🏽 Did I inhale this 600+ page book in around 4 hours whilst also dragging hala along with me for the ride? The correct answer is yes but I didn't just inhale it. I lived it, devoured it, and choked on it. Why you ask? All because of one man and one man only. Whit Lancaster “I think you’d like it if I wrapped my hands around your throat and choked the life out of you. Knowing I was the last face you ever saw.” -the way my pussy just throbbED... HOW IS THIS FAIR I WANT ONE 👄 SPOILERS AHEAD PEOPLE 👄 👉 The Plot 👈 Summer Savage meets Whit Lancaster in the middle of a party one night when they are both aged 14, a night where Whit calls her a whore because her mom is having an affair with his dad when both are married to other people, steals her first kiss, and shows Summer she isn't the only one bathing in dark sexual fantasies. He leaves her with his hate and a memory neither will forget, until 4 years later when they reunite when Summer transfers to the same school as Whit for her senior year. Whit still very much hates Summer for what she represents, the breakdown of his family yet Summer yearns for the darkness that only he seems to match. Wanting Summer gone Whit tries to break her apart by turning the school against her, but when that doesn't work he worms his way into her body and heart, and stumbles upon her secret diary by chance. Whit takes her journal which has secrets Summer never wants to be public, about what happened to her perverted/rapist step-brother, and her step-father who both died in a mysterious fire. Slowly Whit learns more about her secrets and Summer falls under his spell. The Characters: Whit Lan- fine have Summer first, but only because I'm saving the best for last duh! 🌻🍒🌷 Summer Savage 🌷🍒🌻 Summer was a lot different than most NA girls. Firstly she wasn't a virgin and didn't 'save' herself even though she thought about Whit over the years. She experimented and had her fun, was even suspended for getting caught having sex in school too when she was acting out from her broken home and lack of affection from her mom. She was also a lot stronger than I thought she would be considering she wasn't exactly a doormat when it came to Whit. Yes she gave him her body but she also stood up to him when he was bullying her (okay but it wasn't even bullying when all Whit did was shun her ksjjsksdk boy he needed to up his game, me and hala expected something on the level of Untouchable). I think one of the funniest scenes from this book was when Summer almost got beat up by one of Whit's friends, and Whit was already following her home and saved her ass, Streets by Doja Cat started playing on her airpods and she just continued to listen to the song whilst Whit was literally beating another guy up in front of her. Whit- body slamming elliot to the ground in the pouring rain and getting hit himself. Summer - vibing to doja cat, having a main character moment Another thing I loved about Summer was how Whit could literally breathe and she would be fucking horny and thinking about his big cock, because I would do the exact same!!! The parallel between Summer being horny 24/7 whilst Whit just saying mean things to her really had me panting like a dog in heat. Their dynamic was perfect, she got what she wanted from him but didn't hesitate to kick him out after. I just wish we got more journal entries from Summer with a lot more of her secrets being exposed? Whit read like 3/4 entries and that's it. I needed more about Summer and Yate's toxic relationship because she was basically groomed by him. Yates would lust after Summer and try to touch her, but because Summer was so deprived of love and attention, she got a sick thrill from him watching her and let him do stuff to her so he would then quickly go away until he didn't and actually raped her. But that was glossed over a lot? IDK I'm probably being picky but I would've liked to know more. Summer did get kind of annoying in the middle part of the book, girly was becoming too desperate but you know what if I had a man like Whit I would be doing the most too. 💀 Sylvie Lancaster 💀 Ok so next up we have Whit's sister Sylvie, one of the first people to befriend Summer at the school. Unlike her brother, Sylvie didn't have an issue with Summer and they become close friends pretty quickly. Sylvie also struggles with health issues (we're not sure exactly what it is but my two theories were something like cystic fibrosis as Sylvie coughed a lot and pneumonia previously or she actually isn't sick and it's her mom who has made her feel like she is sick by giving her pills so she has Munchausen's disease, maybe I'm reaching but this is what I'm predicting). I liked Sylvie at first, she was funny and unique, she didn't care about what others thought of her and had a funny outlook on life even though she was dying. She is also in love with Whit's best friend Spencer, who is this supposed playboy but really was a total simp for Sylvie but refused to touch her because she's ill. They were supposed to be giving Dean and Rosie (Ruckus) but then Spencer just turned out to be a bland fake playboy and Sylvie turned out to be a fucking bitch. I know this girl will probably get her own book but I don't really care for it, especially if Spencer will be the hero because he did not give what he was supposed to. Other characters I wanna quickly mention: Summer's mom - pathetic at first, only sent a happy birthday text to Summer because she was too busy fucking yet another married man skjskjs, but the plot twist made her go from a -3/10 to a solid 4/10. Whit's mom - total effin bitch. She stole Summer's journal and threatened to expose the real reason behind the fire that killed Summer's rapist step-brother and step-father, and then wrote a fake ass letter from Summer and gave it to Whit to make it look like she didn't want him anymore. Did somebody say psycho??? The men in this book - special mention to the trashiest men to ever exist as characters, because what even? firstly we have yates the creepy rapist, then we have Elliot, Whit's ex-friend who literally tries to beat summer up, then we have the headteacher who is also a perverted creep, and then Bryan a guy who doesn't understand the word no (Summer was only using him to make Whit jealous poor thing) and then Whit's own dad who couldn't stop saying disgusting things about Summer, wanting to do the daughter since he already had her mom euw. Basically moral of this book is, all men are trash except for Whit. 💦🤰🏽🍆 Whittaker Augustus Lancaster 🍆🤰🏽💦 If Jameson Kane and Baron Vicious had a love child it would be Whit. He had the filthiest mouth and I would do anything just to lick the sweat off his toes. “I want to watch you walk around the party tonight and know that my cum is dripping down the inside of your thighs. I want people to smell it on you when you stop and talk to them. I want people to know you just got fucked and you belong to someone else. To me. Do you understand?” - MY NAMES GABBY I'M 12 YEARS OLD AND I'M PREGNANT AS FUCK!!! SKJDSKKSDJDS JAYSUS HE HAS NO RIGHT BEING THIS HOT!!!! possessive men are like crack and I'm an addict yes I am. Whit was cold, he was arrogant, he was unfeeling and genuinely for the first 50% of the book this man could not give two fucks about Summer and I loved it, idc if that makes me sick!!! I'm tired of enemies-lovers/bully books where the hero falls in love straight away. Whit here may have had feelings but reading his POV you wouldn't know because all he wanted was Summer's body and to fuck this hatred out on her. He was no simpering fool and the way he talked about Summer was like she was his favorite toy jsdhkdsjds. “Good.” He sounds pleased. “I’ll eventually fuck you out of my system, give you back that drivel you call your deep thoughts and we can forget this moment in time ever existed.” “Find your value, Savage, and prove to me you’re worth more than a meaningless jerk off.” He waves his hand at me, dismissive. “Now get out.” - Let a man try to talk this way to me in real life... I would be calling the police, but in this book??? the meaner he got the more I realized just how sick i am! But it wasn't just his dirty mouth that I loved, he truly fell for Summer organically, he didn't start off by having sex with her straight away or using sex to bully her. She would've done anything for him and he knew that but they didn't even have sex until like their 4/5th sexual encounter. He in his own way always pushed her to be confident, saving her life not once but twice (beat up both elliot and bryan), challenging her every move, and liberating her sexually. "The girl is an expert dick sucker. Does that sound awful? Yes. Do I still consider her a whore? Confirmed. But now she’s my whore, and I don’t share." -this is peak romance for me. Justice for the degrading trope!! my messed up girls with daddy issues stand up 💕 Are there certain things I would've added to help his character along? Yes. I wish he upped his bullying game, since he didn't specifically do anything, he just snapped his fingers and his minions did it for him. Like at one point I thought Whit would expose Summer's journal entries by photocopying them and displaying them around the school (hala did not approve of this) hehe. But the best thing Whit ever did? My clever boy didn't once believe that Summer would write that fake-ass letter. He knew straight away that his mom and Sylvie made that shit up and the way I was screaming was not healthy!!! I hate miscommunication, it really grates on me when a fantastic couple gets torn away because of one stupid miscommunication, but this book handled it so well. Yes, there was a time jump (16 months), but you know what I will gladly take it. Summer needed some time away from Whit and grow up. She was spiraling and she needed a breather, whilst Whit needed to bide his time and then come and collect his girl once she's ready. Summer left for Paris knowing that she was protecting Whit, because his family were forcing him into an arranged marriage and Summer knew she wouldn't be fit for it. The epilogue was also hilarious because Summer was pregnant and Whit didn't want to disrespect his baby momma and call her a whore but of course Whit is still Whit so he bounces right back: “I believe it with all my heart,” I tell him. “Which you own, by the way. I belong to you.” He touches my face. Strokes my hair. Presses on the back of my head until my mouth is once more aligned with his dick. “That’s nice,” he says, his tone smug and I can’t help the soft laugh that escapes me. “Now suck.” PS - I binged watched S2 of outer banks and for some reason, I couldn't help but cast Rafe from the show as Whit in my head. There is just somehting about those curtain bangs that does it for me... and the blood on his lip? adds that extra jenny say qua, same as Whit when he was beating Elliot up. Thank you to whatever spirit possessed Monica Murphy when she wrote this delicious book and brought my dream man to life. Whit Lancaster all 3 of my holes are yours ❤️

  3. 4 out of 5

    Monica Murphy

    Things I Wanted to Say (But Never Did) is coming soon! This is a standalone. Preorder >>> https://amzn.to/3A6XAWA Things I Wanted to Say (But Never Did) is coming soon! This is a standalone. Preorder >>> https://amzn.to/3A6XAWA

  4. 5 out of 5

    D.L. Howe

    For the first time that I can remember I know exactly why the H hates and belittles the h from the get go. How refreshing! Whit (which is btw the scummiest of all yuppy names) has a Manson like quality. I actually like his sadistic style, I just wish he was a touch less smarmy. More aggression, less spoiled child. This is the steamiest high school bully romance I’ve read to date. Degradation kink is becoming one of my favorites. It’s getting to the point that his cruel words are more for himself For the first time that I can remember I know exactly why the H hates and belittles the h from the get go. How refreshing! Whit (which is btw the scummiest of all yuppy names) has a Manson like quality. I actually like his sadistic style, I just wish he was a touch less smarmy. More aggression, less spoiled child. This is the steamiest high school bully romance I’ve read to date. Degradation kink is becoming one of my favorites. It’s getting to the point that his cruel words are more for himself than her. Denial is a funny thing. For someone that hates her guts, has done everything in his power to make her miserable, he’s awfully gung-ho on making sure that she’s sexually satisfied. My issue with this is all the characters feel flat to me. Like I’m being told what they’re supposed to be like but they just seem like different shades of beige. The only one who leans towards a more colorful spectrum is Sylvie. And later Monty, that guy is fabulous! The pacing is good, there’s plenty going on to keep my attention. It just feels like there’s too much description, I don’t need to know every detail of every surrounding. Also some of the inner monologues are at times repetitive. Omg no wonder, I just saw it’s 604 pages. Too much! “For your birthday. What do you want? I’ll give you whatever you desire.” “I want you to cuddle with me,” she finally answers, her voice small. 🥺 (Oh Summer, you really do pull at my heart strings.) I swear to God, is Augustus bipolar. Marry for love, you have responsibilities to your family, don’t make the same mistake I did, don’t throw away a good match for easy pussy. Make up your damn mind! The best thing I can say about this book is the kink is varied and steamy af. 🌶🌶🌶🌶🌶 Even though the journal was the root of all their problems, at the same time it was their salvation. Monty helped too and I do love a fairy godmother. The thing about hate is that it’s one side of a coin. If they hate you first, there’s a good chance they’ll love you with that same passion later. The more they fight, the cruelty, the more they pull away translates into this all encompassing passionate love. At least that’s how it works in books, thank god for fiction.

  5. 5 out of 5

    eli ♡ [semi-hiatus]

    note: this review contains details from scenes that may be triggering to some, and major/minor spoilers for the novel. ╔∗ ⋅◈⋅ ∗═════════════════════════════╗ 𝚗𝚘𝚠 𝚙𝚕𝚊𝚢𝚒𝚗𝚐: 𝙵𝚞𝚗 𝙶𝚒𝚛𝚕 - 𝚂𝚞𝚖𝚖𝚎𝚛 𝚆𝚊𝚕𝚔𝚎𝚛 𝚞𝚙 𝚗𝚎𝚡𝚝: 𝙻𝚘𝚜𝚒𝚗𝚐 - 𝙷.𝙴.𝚁. 𝚏𝚒𝚗𝚊𝚕 𝚝𝚛𝚊𝚌𝚔: 𝙻𝚎𝚝 𝙼𝚎 𝙴𝚡𝚙𝚕𝚊𝚒𝚗 - 𝙱𝚛𝚢𝚜𝚘𝚗 𝚃𝚒𝚕𝚕𝚎𝚛 0:03 ──⊙──────── 2:48 ↻ ◁ II ▷ ↺ ╚══════════════════════════════∗ ⋅◈⋅ ∗╝ .·:·.☽✧ 3.2 stars ✧☾.·:·. over the course of my romance reading journey, I've encountered many relationships and dynamics. they could vary from unique and peculiar, to m note: this review contains details from scenes that may be triggering to some, and major/minor spoilers for the novel. ╔∗ ⋅◈⋅ ∗═════════════════════════════╗ 𝚗𝚘𝚠 𝚙𝚕𝚊𝚢𝚒𝚗𝚐: 𝙵𝚞𝚗 𝙶𝚒𝚛𝚕 - 𝚂𝚞𝚖𝚖𝚎𝚛 𝚆𝚊𝚕𝚔𝚎𝚛 𝚞𝚙 𝚗𝚎𝚡𝚝: 𝙻𝚘𝚜𝚒𝚗𝚐 - 𝙷.𝙴.𝚁. 𝚏𝚒𝚗𝚊𝚕 𝚝𝚛𝚊𝚌𝚔: 𝙻𝚎𝚝 𝙼𝚎 𝙴𝚡𝚙𝚕𝚊𝚒𝚗 - 𝙱𝚛𝚢𝚜𝚘𝚗 𝚃𝚒𝚕𝚕𝚎𝚛 0:03 ──⊙──────── 2:48 ↻ ◁ II ▷ ↺ ╚══════════════════════════════∗ ⋅◈⋅ ∗╝ .·:·.☽✧ 3.2 stars ✧☾.·:·. over the course of my romance reading journey, I've encountered many relationships and dynamics. they could vary from unique and peculiar, to mediocre and average. the relationship between the main characters, Summer (h) and Whit (H), lands somewhere on that scale, yet it took me a minute to pinpoint where. they have a relationship that may seem peculiar to others, no doubt, but I think their dynamic leans more towards the mediocre and average side of my personal scale. guess I'll have to break down the novel's components so you can better understand my point. ╔════════════╗ .·:·.✧ PLOT ✧.·:·. ╚════════════╝ Summer Savage (h), was a social pariah ✋🚫 because of her mother's "gold digger" tendencies (according to the local tabloids). she was called very derogatory terms because of how Summer's mother, Janine Weatherstone, hopped from one married man to the next, stealing their money along the way. so when Summer meets Whit Lancaster (H) at a social gathering and he says “Come on. Your mom is my dad’s whore. You could be mine too.” Summer is rightfully appalled and furious, yet a little turned on 🥵. can't say the same for me, personally, if I was in that situation, but it worked for her. maybe that's because they were both 14-years-old at the time. anyway, he made that statement after he accused Summer's mother of sleeping with Whit's father, who is a rich and married man 🤵💍. not too long after that, they kiss, do some touching, and Summer meets up with her mother so they can leave. but guess what? Summer realizes that Whit's accusation might hold some truth because her mother did look like she might've hooked up with Whit's father while Summer was away. fast-forward 3 years later, Whit and Summer are attending the same school, Lancaster Prep 🏫. coincidently, it's the same school that Whit's father happens to own. when Summer gets there, she's judged and targeted because of her mother's status, and what happened to her step-father and step-brother. the details to what happened are slowly revealed as the story progresses, and I really liked that. it added a bit of mystery to the story and kept me intrigued because I wanted to know exactly what happened, and why Summer felt so guilty about it all. we love a good mystery 🕵️‍♂️ thrown into the mix. because everyone at the school made Summer feel very unwelcome at the beginning (including Whit, since he was just delighted to see her) “Nice fall earlier. Landing on your knees like that must’ve hurt.” He smirks. “Though I’m sure you’re used to being on your knees.” [...] “I’m sure you’d love it if I fucked you,” he says, his voice low and taunting. I don’t know how the teacher doesn’t hear, but the man must be oblivious. “You’re a cheap whore, just like your mother.” Whit proposes a deal to her: if she sucks him off and lets him cum on her tits for a week straight, then he'll make sure people stop avoiding her like the plague 🏃‍♀️🏃‍♂️ because Whit told them to. "His mouth curves upward. "Suck my dick and let me come on your tits for a week straight, and I'll take the lock off everyone." would I accept that deal? hell no, and neither did my bitch Summer. you may or may not know this, but I love her 💝. do I agree with all her actions? no. do I still love her ambition, courage, and character as a whole? of course. anyway, I'll give a quick rundown of some events you must know about before I continue to the next section: → Summer and Sylvie (Whit's younger sister) become close friends after a detention session 👭. → while Whit beats the shit out of someone who tried to attack Summer, she's jammin' to "Streets" by Doja Cat. we love the music promotion in this household 😌💞. → Whit steals Summer's journal full of her juicy 🍑 secrets the morning after they kinda hook up. then she agrees to "earn it back" by basically being his 24/7 fuck buddy, and that's when their relationship actually sets sail 🚢. ╔══════════════════════╗ .·:·.✧ THE RELATIONSHIP ✧.·:·. ╚══════════════════════╝ as I started talking about in the intro, Summer and Whit's dynamic can be seen as peculiar, to say the least. while reading most of this book, I couldn't describe their relationship. I knew that they fucked a lot, and the author constantly reminded us that they were two broken, yet connected souls 💕. "He touches my face. Grasps my chin lightly with his fingers, tilting my head back. "We will always work, Summer. Look at me." I meet his gaze, noting the intensity in his light blue eyes. "We were made for each other." but while reading the very long conclusion to this story, I slowly found a way to describe their relationship. or more acccuratley, define their relaitonship in a nutshell 🌰. in the beginning, Summer and Whit rely on sexual interactions so they don't have to confront the fact that they don't know each other well. they only have shared experiences and shared sentiments, so they bond over the fact that they're "broken souls"🖤. but after the whole fiasco where Whit's mother, Sylvia Lancaster, blackmails Summer into leaving the Lancaster household where she was visiting for Thanksgiving, the dynamic changes. SL (Sylvia Lancaster) is a snake 🐍, and she used some quick little manipulation tricks to get Summer out of Whit's life (temporarily). after Summer leaves the Lancaster household, she confronts her mother about what really happened to her step-father, Jonas, and her step-brother, Yates. turns out, Summer's mother, Janine, started the fire that killed Yates and Jonas. Janine let Summer believe that she started it because, in her own words, “From your perspective, it was an accident. You didn’t mean to do any of it. You would’ve never been convicted,” she says, dismissing my protest. “Thank God his body was burned beyond recognition. His autopsy results were inconclusive.” it would've seemed like an accident and Summer wouldn't be convicted ⛓️. but it was still wrong that Janine let Summer suffer with all that guilt for so long, while knowing that Summer didn't commit the crime. and Janine's reasoning for killing them was that Jonas wanted to divorce her because she was hooking up with Whit's father, and Janine did not want to divorce because then she'd lose all the fame 📸 and power that came with being Jonas' wife. so she killed him, and Yates in the process. but don't feel bad for Yates, because it gets worse. Yates was repeatedly molesting Summer when she was 14, and he was 16 or 17. Janine had some suspicions that this was going on, yet she turned a blind eye to it all 🙈. Yates even admitted to raping her multiple times because she was "so beautiful he couldn't resist" right before Janine killed him, yet Janine barely comforts Summer after telling her what he said. all Janine says to her is "She rubs my back. "It's a cruel world, darling. Men use us. I hope that doesn't happen to you ever again." which isn't comforting or helpful at all. Jannie knew this was happening to Summer, and she doesn't even apologize. doesn't offer to take her to therapy 👩‍⚕️ or anything. anyway, after this conversation, there's a time jump 💨 to 16 months later. Summer's in Paris with Monty, a guy she met at a party. she's taking some classes, and enjoys life away from the US. all is going well until Monty tricks her into meeting Whit after not talking to him for more than a year. after they have more sexcapades, Whit grovels, apologizes for his past actions, and proves himself to be a more passionate and caring man, they end up together in the end 💏. "It’s as if it’s permanently etched into his skin, and I remember the Whit of old. The boy who would stare at me with blank eyes. Who looked at me as if I didn’t matter. Who would actually tell me to my face that I didn’t matter to him at all. He’s gone. Replaced by a seemingly overly passionate man whose entire focus is on me and no one else." even though they're together again, things aren't the same as they were before. yes, they're still fuck bunnies who act all lovey-dovey with each other. but their relationship became normal and mundane once they reunited. or maybe their relationship was like that all along 🤔. think about it: when they were in high school, they'd go on sexcapades and say they hate each other, but secretly think they're made for one another. yet their relationship didn't have much substance. other than the "I hate you" shit, their relationship was pretty regular, if you don't consider the whole rich family 💸 and arranged marriage 💍 drama going on in the sidelines. since they clearly stopped "hating" each other towards the end, it was easy to see that they're relationship was just normal. there's nothing wrong with a normal relationship, of course, but I still want to point it out 👉. I think that's why I got kinda tired of their relationship at about 50%. it seemed like they were doing the same old shit, but with new drama. like Whitney said, "same script, different cast". or in this case, some new cast members were added to the play to stir up drama. ╔═════════════════╗ .·:·.✧ CHARACTERS ✧.·:·. ╚═════════════════╝ → Summer is that bitch 💅, when she wants to be. I liked Summer's character a lot, but she always chose when she wanted to have a backbone. when a dumb bitch insults her because of a preposterous rumor, Summer claps back without hesitation. “At least I’m not fucking someone’s daddy to keep myself enrolled,” one of them taunts. She’s young. Beautiful. Mean as a snake. One of Whit’s hangers-on. “At least I’m not slobbering all over Whit Lancaster’s dick, desperate to get a taste,” I toss back at her. “You’re a bitch,” she snaps. “And you’re a heartless cunt who wears too much makeup,” I toss back at her." when Summer says shit like that, it makes me want to hand her the crown she deserves 🙌👑. but then shit like this happens "Once there’s a lull in foot traffic, I dart out and make my way to my room, pressing flat against the door when a group of senior girls walk past me. Two of them are Caitlyn and Jane. My so-called new friends from the first day of school. “Slut,” one of them murmurs beneath her breath just before they all burst into laughter. I say nothing, my face hot." and I want to slam my head against a wall 🤦‍♂️. I know she's exhausted, and I know she's been through a lot, but can she just smack some sense into those two dimwits real quick? it's not that hard. at least Summer acknowledges that she can be a dormant sometimes, especially around Whit. "This is the second time we’ve done this. And it throws me. He throws me. I don’t know what’s happening between us. Why he’s being so agreeable. Thoughtful. It’s exhilarating. It’s scary. But I do realize one thing. I’m completely defenseless. Weak to him and his wants. His needs. He knows it. He has complete command of me. Body and soul. And it is a terrifying position to find myself in." aside from her doormat tendencies, I love her a lot. Summer was a really strong, compassionate, and intelligent character. one of my favorite scenes of hers was when she went to Paris. while in Paris, she realizes that she can be her own independent person without Whit, or anyone else. "I've made a lot of mistakes in my life. I will continue to make them, but I feel more in control now. More mature. I know I still have a lot of growing to do, but I was on the track to nowhere back in the States. At Lancaster. With my mother. If I'd stayed in the city, God knows what would've happened to me. I am without doubt my mother's daughter, though I don't plan on following in her footsteps." she had a lot of development as a character, which I really liked, but I think her character development was dimmed when Whit found her again. when they reunited, she went back to the same person she was back in high school. the drastic shift really disappointed me, but unfortunately, I expected it 😒. → Whit is alright. I don't know how else to describe him. he had some steamy scenes 🔥💦, but other than that, there wasn't much to him. his parents put him into an arranged marriage because they're the Lancasters, a rich family with old money 💰. Whit can't possibly marry anyone else except for his arranged marriage partner because then the bloodlines won't be continued (?). I don't really understand that logic, but whatever. Summer is basically the opposite of whom he's supposed to marry, yet he can't stay away from her. he treats her badly (at times), calls her names 🤬, and often disrespects her all-around. but he defends her to other people, and knows that if he would ever marry anyone, it'd be Summer. sometimes he's passionate towards her (especially in the last 80% of the novel), but it wasn't a regular occurrence with his character. I liked him overall, but I was once again disappointed that he didn't have much development. yes, he did make changes in his life, like standing up to his mother and father about what he wanted. but the thing is, other than that, he didn't really have any character development 🤷‍♂️. extra characters that don't matter → Sylvie, Whit's sister, was a bitch. she was not that bitch, just a bitch. I kinda liked her because of her friendship with Summer, but as soon as she switched sides, that little bit of civility I had towards her disappeared 🖕. "You have no idea what you're talking about, or what it's like, being a part of this family. One of the most important families in the country, if not the world. Our place in society is firmly rooted, and we can't afford to let it be ruined by some stupid, whorish girl who's set her sights on us. You're just on the fringe. Always on the outskirts, the sad little girl standing longingly in the window." Sylvie sneers. "Just like your mother, I hear." [..] Sylvie slams her cup onto the nearby table and leans forward in her chair, her narrowed gaze aimed at me. "Listen. You just used me to get to spend a week alone with Whit. So you can fuck him into thinking you're the perfect woman for him. I always thought Whit was smarter than that, but clearly you have a magical vagina because it's all he can think about. And now, somehow you've convinced him to go against everything our family stands for." can I slap her now? thank you. it's so ironic that she's talking about looking out the window longingly, when that's literally what she does. Summer can do whatever she wants with whomever she wants, yet Sylvie is sick 🤒 and barely interacts with people. and no, I don't care that she's sick and has health issues. am I supposed to ignore all those out of pocket insults just because she's sick? hell no. I'm glad Summer isn't friends with her anymore because I wouldn't want to be friends with a bitch who switches sides like it's her fucking job 👩‍💼. → Sylvia Lancaster, Whit's mother, is the 2'nd most disappointing adult in this novel. I won't talk about her character much because she doesn't deserve it at all. she's a rich, jealous, and spiteful old lady 👵 that has nothing better to do than terrorize a teenage girl all because of her mother's mistakes. → Augustus Lancaster, Whit's father, is the best spineless doormat in town. if you thought Summer had some doormat tendencies, then you'll think Augustus is the doormat king 🚪👑. seriously, he just lets his rude and petty wife do whatever the fuck she wants, and he doesn't say shit. no, he just has multiple mistresses to get his mind off his wife's despicable activity. → Janine Weatherstone, Summer's mother, is a woman more selfish than Sylvia. I know, that must be hard to believe, but it's true. when Janine had a snaking suspicion that Yates was molesting Summer, she turned a blind eye to it 🙈. why? because she was too wrapped up in her own bullshit to pick up the clues and care for her own daughter, of course. "I saw you lave Yates' room," she says, averting her gaze, staring off into the distance as if she's lost in her memories. "I had a suspicion about you two, and I didn't want to believe it. Deep down, I knew. I knew, but I didn't know how to stop it. I thought, perhaps, that you wanted--to be in a relationship with him." Tears well in my eyes and I want to scream at her. That was the last thing I wanted. And if she suspected, why didn't she try and stop it? Stop him? Why didn't she say something to me? To Yates? To Jonas? Because she's selfish. Thoughtless. Too wrapped up in her own bullshit." I know that Summer eventually forgave her, but I just can't fuck with Janine ✋. she's most definitely the most disappointing adult in this book. ╔═════════════════╗ .·:·.✧ CONCLUSION ✧.·:·. ╚═════════════════╝ in summary, Summer was a saving grace 😇🙏 for this novel, but even she couldn't save it all. having such a long ending/epilogue like that was just unnecessary, and it made me want to DNF the whole book, even though I was at like 80 or 90%. if the ending wasn't so extensive, this whole novel could've been a lot shorter. but the slight bit of mystery 🕵️‍♂️ involved with Summer's backstory was an aspect I really enjoyed, and it kept me interested. although I criticized a lot of this book, I enjoyed reading it overall. would most definitely recommend to anyone who wants a hate-to-love type of book that is a little too long 📕 for its own good.

  6. 5 out of 5

    Carla Bulian

    The characters are immature, and the manner he treats her is disgusting, and she doesn’t have the power to change her weaknesses! This story unfortunately don’t makes me comfortable.

  7. 5 out of 5

    nikita

    whit lancaster could give you an orgasm and make you see stars. that man knows his way around a girl and that’s expected cause he did that for a good half of the book. and that’s it, this was just whit and summer getting laid, showing us how hot hate sex can be and then they eventually fall in love...that’s the book

  8. 4 out of 5

    Sarah

    ***AVAILABLE NOW*** 4.5 STARS Monica Murphy delivered a bully romance that was filled to the brim with antagonism and STEAM for dayssss. Whit is a true bully anti-hero. The things he says, the way he treats Summer is vile, and yet, I found myself loving him. There is a lot between Summer and him that explains his treatment of her. What really made me love him though was his evolution as a character as he learned to love and take ownership of his life. He still kept that bully vibe and the type of ***AVAILABLE NOW*** 4.5 STARS Monica Murphy delivered a bully romance that was filled to the brim with antagonism and STEAM for dayssss. Whit is a true bully anti-hero. The things he says, the way he treats Summer is vile, and yet, I found myself loving him. There is a lot between Summer and him that explains his treatment of her. What really made me love him though was his evolution as a character as he learned to love and take ownership of his life. He still kept that bully vibe and the type of kink they liked in the bedroom, which stems from the bully beginning of their relationship, but Monica wrote it in a way that you could see the love within the bedroom scenes and his actions and words in their daily life. Summer was an amazing heroine. She has kind of been handed an awful life, but she rolls with the punches refusing to let others see her as weak. She takes nothing lying down and even pushes and pokes back at Whit. She is really his equal the whole way through the book. One of the most interesting parts of the book was the physical relationship. This is a MATURE YA (seniors in high school) and it follows them to their 20s. Both of these characters feel their proclivities in the bedroom are dark, but really, I felt like it was a burgeoning exploration of their kink, what they find as erotic and desirable in the bedroom. Within each other, they found what they needed. The physical element develops into so much more as the story progresses, as the revenge plot turns into an epic love. Now, there were a few plot points/threads that were just kind of dropped for me or weren’t resolved. I needed those to happen. If they would have, this, for sure, would have been a 5 STAR read. Now, these are secondary plot lines that push the plot forward, so they are needed and it is why they didn’t affect my overall rating that much. I literally devoured this book. It is a thick book, like 600+ pages . I read it in two days, picking it up at red lights, while cooking, etc. Summer and Whit’s relationship was all consuming and I loved seeing them evolve from this hatred fueled obsession to real and lasting love you risk it all for. ARC review Trigger Warnings - DM me if you have questions

  9. 4 out of 5

    Lisa

    4.5 The hero Whit was soo mean and nasty and i loved it!

  10. 5 out of 5

    BLuvsBooks

    Holy crap that was intense! From the hate, to the level of spice, and the secrets. The story gripped me from the start and didn’t let up till the end. I loved and hated it. I hated how awful Whit was to Summer but I also loved that it made me feel that pit in my stomach anger and sadness. Whit and Summer have a history and family entanglements that he blames her for. He hates her but is also obsessed with her. She doesn’t want to give into her feelings for him nor her need for his darkness. “The Holy crap that was intense! From the hate, to the level of spice, and the secrets. The story gripped me from the start and didn’t let up till the end. I loved and hated it. I hated how awful Whit was to Summer but I also loved that it made me feel that pit in my stomach anger and sadness. Whit and Summer have a history and family entanglements that he blames her for. He hates her but is also obsessed with her. She doesn’t want to give into her feelings for him nor her need for his darkness. “The kiss, his possessive words, are like a balm. They piece me together when all he’s trying to do is tear me apart.” I loved the dual POV so we can really feel how their actions effect each other rather then just be told it. The plot is interwoven with other characters perfectly while not taking anything away from the main characters. If you are looking for an unputdownable read with a possessive alphahole bully with lots of steam Then this is your next read. New Adult contemporary. Dual POV. Standalone

  11. 4 out of 5

    Jen (jensdreamylittlereads)

    4.5 STARS I LOVE when a book completely surprises me. I could not put this book down! I'm not sure what my expectations were, but The Things I Wanted To Say (But Never Did) definitely exceeded them. Whit and Summer’s story pulled me in from the very first page, and I read this book straight through in one sitting. I could not wait to see how this story ended, and the Monica Murphy gave me everything I wanted and more. It was filled with angst, wit, drama, supreme sexiness, and characters I could 4.5 STARS I LOVE when a book completely surprises me. I could not put this book down! I'm not sure what my expectations were, but The Things I Wanted To Say (But Never Did) definitely exceeded them. Whit and Summer’s story pulled me in from the very first page, and I read this book straight through in one sitting. I could not wait to see how this story ended, and the Monica Murphy gave me everything I wanted and more. It was filled with angst, wit, drama, supreme sexiness, and characters I could both love and hate. One thing I loved about this book was Summer. She was tough and brave. With the cruel way Whit treated her, she still managed to defend herself and keep her head held high. Whit is a hero that every reader will love to hate. I sure as hell did. But as much as I wanted to hate him, I can't deny that I was always wondering what was buried right below the surface to make him act the way he did because you just knew there had to be something. Monica Murphy did a phenomenal job with character development and that's what made the book as good as it was. The characters were multi-faceted and strongly developed. You get to know both of them as the story progresses and you also begin to understand both of them that much more. Whit and Summer’s complicated relationship throughout the book was full of tension and animosity. But there was also hot and steamy moments between them. It might have seemed unbelievable for them to have any sort of romance, but I understood it. Even though Whit relentlessly bullied her, Summer couldn't help having feelings for him. I just loved how their relationship developed. It wasn't easy and suited them and their situation. This story had me hooked from beginning to end. The entire book was addictive reading and unputdownable, the characters were memorable, and I loved all the intensely hot moments. This would have been an easy five star read if not for a few niggling unresolved plot points, which I needed some kind of resolution. That said, I have to commend Monica Murphy for writing such an addicting, consuming and well-done book.

  12. 4 out of 5

    Miftahul

    Summer and Whit are the most frustrating character i read. These two are reckless, confusing af and annoying. First of all, the word “ i am sick” “ you are sick” “ we are sick” is repeated in every chapter. I GET IT THEY ARE SICK. Like how hard is the author trying to convince that these two are sick in the head. But the thing is that they dont even do anything bad, they just have sex. I would call that vanilla sex. But the author is trying to convince us these two characters are sick by repeati Summer and Whit are the most frustrating character i read. These two are reckless, confusing af and annoying. First of all, the word “ i am sick” “ you are sick” “ we are sick” is repeated in every chapter. I GET IT THEY ARE SICK. Like how hard is the author trying to convince that these two are sick in the head. But the thing is that they dont even do anything bad, they just have sex. I would call that vanilla sex. But the author is trying to convince us these two characters are sick by repeating the same words and not by action. The amount of sex there is bored me to death. 50% there are like a 100 sex scenes. Whit steals Summers journal where she wrote how her step brother sexually assaulted her and Whit be like “eh next”. The book focuses on the journal but the journal had no part at all. Whit didnt give a shit what Summer wrote, he was like eh.

  13. 4 out of 5

    Mia

    When I say NOTHING worked for me I really mean it. Whit and Summer are two most annoying characters I ever read about and on top it all they have no chemistry together. This book is way too long, so many scenes are repetitive, if you trimmed that it would be leight of novella. Also I have no problem with dark romance/ bully romance but this is just bad in my opinion.

  14. 4 out of 5

    Jessica

    Stupid Don’t waste your time. Zero character development. No redeeming quality’s to the jerk. And some weird back story with the sister and the jerks mom.

  15. 4 out of 5

    Elisa ❀

    this is a bully romance with lots of sex (i got bored of it pretty soon) and a little bit of blackmail. things i liked: - at the end they had an actual conversation about how he treated her. usually in bully romances at the end is like the girl completely forgot how bad he treated her, but here they had a conversation end he seemed like he was actually sorry. - the fanfic vibes, the author would describe the girl's outfits and all i could think were those fanfics in which the author would put a l this is a bully romance with lots of sex (i got bored of it pretty soon) and a little bit of blackmail. things i liked: - at the end they had an actual conversation about how he treated her. usually in bully romances at the end is like the girl completely forgot how bad he treated her, but here they had a conversation end he seemed like he was actually sorry. - the fanfic vibes, the author would describe the girl's outfits and all i could think were those fanfics in which the author would put a link to the actual look. things i didn't like: - the length of this book. this is a 600 pages book, for me, 400 would be the perfect length. - he stole her journal and started blackmailing her, that's not a nice thing to do but i loved reading her journal. the problem was that by 50% the journal was basically forgotten and the thing is, the title of this book is what she calls her journal, so i wanted more journals! i know that it might sound like i hated this book, but no. there were scenes that i was smiling while i was reading, i just wanted less sex and more romantic moments, you know the little things that actually build a romance, like remembering something the person likes. one thing i love in bully romances is the 'i hate everyone but you' trope, but here, for the most part of the book i felt like he also hated her. btw,he called her his whore all the time, and all i could think was this

  16. 4 out of 5

    wandering. bibliophile_

    What would it be like,to have this boy's heart? I wonder as I slowly drift off to sleep. Impossible,is what I tell myself. He doesn't have one. I am downright obsessed with this story, the characters, the hate to love, the angst,the passion-lust-love, everything is just fuelled with so much power and boy the hunger between these two souls and how they just click together-I loved this story. Monica Murphy has outdone herself with this book. I honestly was bit skeptical as I'm very picky when it What would it be like,to have this boy's heart? I wonder as I slowly drift off to sleep. Impossible,is what I tell myself. He doesn't have one. I am downright obsessed with this story, the characters, the hate to love, the angst,the passion-lust-love, everything is just fuelled with so much power and boy the hunger between these two souls and how they just click together-I loved this story. Monica Murphy has outdone herself with this book. I honestly was bit skeptical as I'm very picky when it comes to bully romance, the balance when it comes to hate to love and she just wrote this book spectacularly. It is dark,gritty, raw,emotional and just downright addicting. This story has Romeo Juliet vibes, two families whose paths should never cross again, and yet Summer Savage ends up in the prep school owned by the Lancaster's, right in the clutches of Whit Lancaster-the cold ruthless boy who is determined to turn her life upside down. Summer is not the weak girl he thinks her to be, she's the only one who won't bow down to him and fights him back every step of the way. But the secrets Summer carries are about to come out, Whit got hold of her journal hiding her deepest,darkest secrets and biding by his will is the only way Summer can stop him. This book is unlike anything I've read in a while. Both these characters are damaged, dark, twisted and so broken on the inside. They spite each other only to come back to each other for more. Their souls see the darkness in one another and with every interaction between then they each get deeper into each other's lives, their hearts entwining and soon they are falling hard for each other. The hate to love is so intense,sizzling and the chemistry between Summer and Whit is just off the charts. It's just I hate you, I cant stand you but I'm obsessed with you,you're mine vibes and I WAS LIVING FOR IT. Whit's character drew me in really hard. He was so cold and heartless from the beginning, he was mean to Summer and yet the one who cared for her fiercelessly, he was both her tormentor and her protector. I live for anti-heroes who end up being total mush for the girl and I loved to see Whit fall in love. Summer is a strong,feisty,bold and she owns upto herself. She has been through a lot and her story blended with Whit so well.Whit and Summer are my new obsession definitely.

  17. 4 out of 5

    V.💜GreedyThirstForForbidden🖤

    ⭐️4.40 secret stars⭐️ ~𝑩𝒖𝒕 𝑰 𝒍𝒐𝒏𝒈 𝒇𝒐𝒓 𝒕𝒉𝒂𝒕. 𝑭𝒐𝒓 𝒂 𝒎𝒂𝒏 𝒕𝒐 𝒍𝒐𝒐𝒌 𝒂𝒕 𝒎𝒆 𝒘𝒊𝒕𝒉 𝒉𝒖𝒏𝒈𝒆𝒓 𝒊𝒏 𝒉𝒊𝒔 𝒈𝒂𝒛𝒆. 𝑻𝒐 𝒓𝒆𝒂𝒄𝒉 𝒇𝒐𝒓 𝒎𝒆 𝒂𝒔 𝒊𝒇 𝒉𝒆 𝒄𝒂𝒏'𝒕 𝒉𝒆𝒍𝒑 𝒉𝒊𝒎𝒔𝒆𝒍𝒇. 𝑰 𝒘𝒂𝒏𝒕 𝒕𝒐 𝒃𝒆 𝒂𝒅𝒐𝒓𝒆𝒅. 𝑹𝒂𝒗𝒊𝒔𝒉𝒆𝒅. 𝑳𝒐𝒗𝒆𝒅. 𝑰 𝒘𝒂𝒏𝒕 𝒊𝒕 𝒕𝒐 𝒃𝒆 𝒃𝒊𝒈 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝒘𝒐𝒏𝒅𝒆𝒓𝒇𝒖𝒍 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝒎𝒆𝒔𝒔𝒚 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝒐𝒗𝒆𝒓𝒘𝒉𝒆𝒍𝒎𝒊𝒏𝒈. ~ A bully to the core romance, well developed characters a solid plot and a fast paced narrative make of this story an enjoyable journey. This is a long, no joke, very long book and I feel the author made the right choice! The pages are necessary to show the full ⭐️4.40 secret stars⭐️ ~𝑩𝒖𝒕 𝑰 𝒍𝒐𝒏𝒈 𝒇𝒐𝒓 𝒕𝒉𝒂𝒕. 𝑭𝒐𝒓 𝒂 𝒎𝒂𝒏 𝒕𝒐 𝒍𝒐𝒐𝒌 𝒂𝒕 𝒎𝒆 𝒘𝒊𝒕𝒉 𝒉𝒖𝒏𝒈𝒆𝒓 𝒊𝒏 𝒉𝒊𝒔 𝒈𝒂𝒛𝒆. 𝑻𝒐 𝒓𝒆𝒂𝒄𝒉 𝒇𝒐𝒓 𝒎𝒆 𝒂𝒔 𝒊𝒇 𝒉𝒆 𝒄𝒂𝒏'𝒕 𝒉𝒆𝒍𝒑 𝒉𝒊𝒎𝒔𝒆𝒍𝒇. 𝑰 𝒘𝒂𝒏𝒕 𝒕𝒐 𝒃𝒆 𝒂𝒅𝒐𝒓𝒆𝒅. 𝑹𝒂𝒗𝒊𝒔𝒉𝒆𝒅. 𝑳𝒐𝒗𝒆𝒅. 𝑰 𝒘𝒂𝒏𝒕 𝒊𝒕 𝒕𝒐 𝒃𝒆 𝒃𝒊𝒈 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝒘𝒐𝒏𝒅𝒆𝒓𝒇𝒖𝒍 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝒎𝒆𝒔𝒔𝒚 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝒐𝒗𝒆𝒓𝒘𝒉𝒆𝒍𝒎𝒊𝒏𝒈. ~ A bully to the core romance, well developed characters a solid plot and a fast paced narrative make of this story an enjoyable journey. This is a long, no joke, very long book and I feel the author made the right choice! The pages are necessary to show the full evolution of the story and they also provide a believable time frame to allow a proper development of the characters. The fast paced narrative and actions never make it repetitive or give vibes of a dragging story. Whit is an arrogant, damaged scowling rich young boy, his sculpted jaw and to die for good look don’t make up for his despicable attitude. He has a permanent chip on his shoulder, serious issues and a gloom future planned out for him from when he was a little child. I must admit it took me quite some time to like Whit, make that 75% of the book 😂 however I’m not saying this as a bad thing, in fact I appreciate how the author managed to make him so unlikable, perfectly in line with a true bully characteristics. His actions are horrible most of the time even if I understood why he behaved a certain way, I didn’t find it justifiable enough. That said every time I sworn him off, he went on and redeemed himself with some seemingly noble action. I liked how the author balanced the darkness in his personality. “~"𝒀𝒐𝒖'𝒓𝒆 𝒘𝒓𝒐𝒏𝒈 𝑺𝒂𝒗𝒂𝒈𝒆. 𝑳𝒊𝒇𝒆 𝒊𝒔 𝒂 𝒈𝒂𝒎𝒆, 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝒑𝒓𝒆𝒕𝒕𝒚 𝒎𝒖𝒄𝒉 𝒆𝒗𝒆𝒓𝒚𝒐𝒏𝒆 𝒕𝒉𝒂𝒕'𝒔 𝒊𝒏 𝒕𝒉𝒊𝒔 𝒓𝒐𝒐𝒎 𝒊𝒔 𝒂 𝒍𝒐𝒔𝒆𝒓". "𝑾𝒊𝒕𝒉 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒆𝒙𝒄𝒆𝒑𝒕𝒊𝒐𝒏 𝒐𝒇 𝒎𝒆" ~ Summer appears like a naive innocent young girl from the first line, as the story progress she becomes more and more of a disaster. The so called family surrounding her worsen her situation, her own mother blind to what’s going on under her roof, she’s only focused on her well-being neglecting her daughter in her most fragile moments, Summer isn’t loved nor cherished. Her reckless behaviour a clear cry for help. Her effort to be seen most of the time bring the wrong attention on herself. Her journal is her only ally, she can jam its pages with all her woes and secrets, even the darkest and most dangerous, a journal so precious should never fall into the wrong hands. ~ 𝑰 𝒘𝒂𝒏𝒕𝒆𝒅 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒑𝒂𝒊𝒏. 𝑰 𝒘𝒂𝒔 𝒍𝒆𝒂𝒏𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒊𝒏𝒕𝒐 𝒉𝒊𝒔 𝒑𝒂𝒍𝒎, 𝒔𝒊𝒍𝒆𝒏𝒕𝒍𝒚 𝒃𝒆𝒈𝒈𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒇𝒐𝒓 𝒊𝒕. 𝑰 𝒉𝒂𝒕𝒆 𝒎𝒚𝒔𝒆𝒍𝒇 𝒇𝒐𝒓 𝒘𝒂𝒏𝒕𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒊𝒕. 𝑭𝒐𝒓 𝒘𝒂𝒏𝒕𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒉𝒊𝒎.~ Whit and Summer’s story isn’t pretty let alone peachy, it’s full of holes, heartbreak and pain and yet it fits them perfectly. It’s dysfunctional but it’s their story, perfectly imperfect. I enjoyed how these two had to strive hard to get where they were meant to be. I didn’t approve some of their actions but then I remember how young they were and it fits the bill of thoughtless tormented teenagers. This book shows, once again, how difficult growing up is and how easily, we adults, forget what is like to be a teenager. ~ 𝑯𝒆'𝒔 𝒂 𝒔𝒊𝒄𝒌, 𝒇𝒘𝒊𝒔𝒕𝒆𝒅 𝒇𝒖𝒄𝒌. 𝑫𝒂𝒎𝒂𝒈𝒆𝒅. 𝑩𝒓𝒐𝒌𝒆𝒏. 𝑩𝒖𝒕 𝒉𝒆 𝒑𝒖𝒍𝒍𝒔 𝒂𝒕 𝒔𝒐𝒎𝒆𝒕𝒉𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒅𝒆𝒆𝒑 𝒘𝒊𝒕𝒉𝒊𝒏 𝒎𝒆. 𝑺𝒐𝒎𝒆𝒕𝒉𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝑰 𝒅𝒐𝒏'𝒕 𝒖𝒏𝒅𝒆𝒓𝒔𝒕𝒂𝒏𝒅. 𝑯𝒆 𝒎𝒂𝒌𝒆𝒔 𝒎𝒆 𝒇𝒆𝒆𝒍. ~ P.S. psssst Ms Murphy… Sylvie’s story definitely feels unfinished, so I hope it’s coming soon… pretty please 🥺

  18. 5 out of 5

    Lina's Reviews ❥Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ❥ღೋBook Blogღೋ ❥Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ❥

    I knew this book was gonna have a big impact on me from the moment I read the synopsis. I do love an angsty, character driven book and this delivered. If you are looking for a hot,filthy and steamy read then you need to add this book to your TBR. First of all let me say that his book is not an easy read. It is full of teen drama. We have a really rude and cruel hero and a heroine with self esteem issues. This is not your typical enemies to lovers romance. It is dark and for the first half of the I knew this book was gonna have a big impact on me from the moment I read the synopsis. I do love an angsty, character driven book and this delivered. If you are looking for a hot,filthy and steamy read then you need to add this book to your TBR. First of all let me say that his book is not an easy read. It is full of teen drama. We have a really rude and cruel hero and a heroine with self esteem issues. This is not your typical enemies to lovers romance. It is dark and for the first half of the book it seemed like it would be my next five star read. I think what made me rate this lower is its length. It was too long and while it was long I didn't get the character development I wanted. I didn't get that part of their relationship where it is not just sex but connection. I do love my smut BUT I want it wrapped in emotion . I did think that Summer and Whit had amazing chemistry. Their scenes were sizzling but after a while I wanted something more than just the steam. I wanted Whit to grovel and Summer not to contradict herself. Be strong ,girl. Don't be at his beck and call! Nevertheless,the book was really enjoyable even if I am getting too old for so much teenage drama. Lol I am also very curious about Spencer and Sylvie. Hope they get their own book! 🌟🌟🌟🌟 Stars

  19. 5 out of 5

    The Romantic Rush Blog

    This is Monica Murphy like I’ve never read her before- AND I AM HERE FOR IT! Darker, steamier, edgier- and oh so addictive! While this story has bully beginnings, it evolves into something so much more interesting and complex. It’s psychologically captivating, a dynamic exploration of power, perception, healing, and redemption. Whit is just the WORST- and I love him. Depraved, despicable, asshole, arrogant, unhinged. The kind of hero that you’re pretty sure you need therapy for falling so madly i This is Monica Murphy like I’ve never read her before- AND I AM HERE FOR IT! Darker, steamier, edgier- and oh so addictive! While this story has bully beginnings, it evolves into something so much more interesting and complex. It’s psychologically captivating, a dynamic exploration of power, perception, healing, and redemption. Whit is just the WORST- and I love him. Depraved, despicable, asshole, arrogant, unhinged. The kind of hero that you’re pretty sure you need therapy for falling so madly in love with. By far one of the most messed up bullies I’ve read, but also one of the most nuanced. There’s an aching vulnerability to him that draws you in- a woundedness that spoke to me, despite his horribleness. Our heroine Summer- my lord what this girl endures. Humiliation, shame, emotional manipulation, heartbreak. Despite it all, she’s kind, she patient, and she’s giving. But she’s also strong- I loved seeing her find her voice, her own power after being powerless for pretty much her whole damn life. She’s impossible not to admire for her resilience - but even more so for the fact that despite all she’s been through, she has the courage to still hope for good in others. Their chemistry is complicated and consuming. A beautiful mess- equal parts twisted and magical. And lord are they HOT. Whit has a mouth that would make a sailor blush- and these two have a kinky streak I couldn’t get enough of. I was obsessed with every moment. Both characters grow in ways both meaningful and compelling- from finding their own true selves within each other first and then learning how to be the better version of themselves to be the true partner the other needs. Two jagged broken pieces perfectly matched. This is about growing up into better yourself by confronting your worst. These are two characters with pretty deeply traumatic demons, and I love how Monica has them spiral together even more deeply in their darkness before they learn to claw their way out. The are some amazing and unexpected twists and shifts in the story, and a few that for me felt a bit abrupt. The very last leg of the book in particular- with the ending satisfying but not quite as fantastic as the rest of this story. The story is quite long- and the exposition and ending perhaps not perfectly weighted, but I loved the book so hard that this didn't phase me much. This story is bold and unexpected, for me a whole new version of the fabulous Monica Murphy, and all I can say is I need MORE! One of the best book surprises of the year! 4.5 stars

  20. 4 out of 5

    Kandace Denys (bookish_kayy)

    Sheesh Five stars has been SO HARD to come by lately, but when I tell you that Whit grabbed me by the throat and made sure that I gave him all his stars, it’s no joke. This book. The steam was A1, the story between them flowed, and it gave me every ounce of bully that I wanted. And then when I caught a glimpse of what was behind the bully, I swooned so hard. This definitely wasn’t necessarily dark, but it definitely did touch on some triggering topics. I’d definitely read Sylvie’s story. I have SO Sheesh Five stars has been SO HARD to come by lately, but when I tell you that Whit grabbed me by the throat and made sure that I gave him all his stars, it’s no joke. This book. The steam was A1, the story between them flowed, and it gave me every ounce of bully that I wanted. And then when I caught a glimpse of what was behind the bully, I swooned so hard. This definitely wasn’t necessarily dark, but it definitely did touch on some triggering topics. I’d definitely read Sylvie’s story. I have SO MANY QUESTIONS about her.

  21. 5 out of 5

    BookSmackedMel

    Run do not walk to get this book !!!!!!!!!!!! I'm super late with this review and for that I apologize cause honestly this book goes on my top reads of 2021. First this book is hella thicc and in a good way, It's defo got some girth. So make sure you have ample hours of reading time because once you get into it you will not want to come up for air. I didn't stop until it dawn was upon me because I got so captivated in this story and so desperately needed to see how it would play out. This has so Run do not walk to get this book !!!!!!!!!!!! I'm super late with this review and for that I apologize cause honestly this book goes on my top reads of 2021. First this book is hella thicc and in a good way, It's defo got some girth. So make sure you have ample hours of reading time because once you get into it you will not want to come up for air. I didn't stop until it dawn was upon me because I got so captivated in this story and so desperately needed to see how it would play out. This has some seriously spicys scenes with an anti-hero H that will make you love to hate him. The stuff that came out of his mouth at times had me wanting to smack him and the other stuff he would say had me saying OH MY FACKKKKK this is some hot shit. Like damn, I'm feeling a certain type of way. I loved this story, I loved the relationship the push and pull. The love and hate. I ate all of it up and then some. As far as enemies to lovers / bully romances goes, Things I Wanted to Say by Monica Murphy cements itself as one of my ultimate favs and lands on my READ OR DIE LIST !!!

  22. 4 out of 5

    Simply Love Book Reviews

    Wow! This story was such an engrossing read from the very first page. Whit Lancaster is used to getting everything he wants. Being raised in on the country’s wealthiest family’s, he attends a school that shares his last name. He is a cocky, entitled jerk who treats people like they are beneath him. Summer Savage has had an interesting life. After a scandal, she transfers to Lancaster Prep their senior year. Her encounters with Whit are hostile and he treats her horribly. When she is in a danger Wow! This story was such an engrossing read from the very first page. Whit Lancaster is used to getting everything he wants. Being raised in on the country’s wealthiest family’s, he attends a school that shares his last name. He is a cocky, entitled jerk who treats people like they are beneath him. Summer Savage has had an interesting life. After a scandal, she transfers to Lancaster Prep their senior year. Her encounters with Whit are hostile and he treats her horribly. When she is in a dangerous situation, he saves her and she is confused since he openly hates her. They enter in to an agreement that is beneficial to them both, but is extremely toxic. I don’t know how to describe their relationship other than toxic. They can’t stand each other, but they can’t bear to see the other with someone else. They are up and down and every which way. Readers will want them together, but at the same time want them to move on. I loved the characters and their backstories will having you hoping that they work out their issues. Such an amazing, emotional rollercoaster ride with these two deeply conflicted individuals. Cannot express how much I loved them and their story. Review copy provided for a voluntary review.

  23. 4 out of 5

    sadhika ˊˎ-

    after reading this, i can safely say that i'd give up my firstborn just to have Whit Lancaster for thirty seconds. i haven't read a dark bully romance in ages and this book just put me in all my feels because Whit... oh, Whit. i can't stop thinking about this man. he is the epitome of an alpha male and his dirt-talk? i felt like a woman in the 19th century who'd swoon and faint after hearing him talk. “Soon you’ll become so addicted to me, no one else can have you. You’ll crave everything only after reading this, i can safely say that i'd give up my firstborn just to have Whit Lancaster for thirty seconds. i haven't read a dark bully romance in ages and this book just put me in all my feels because Whit... oh, Whit. i can't stop thinking about this man. he is the epitome of an alpha male and his dirt-talk? i felt like a woman in the 19th century who'd swoon and faint after hearing him talk. “Soon you’ll become so addicted to me, no one else can have you. You’ll crave everything only I can give you, and when it’s over, when I eventually deny you this…” He thrusts against me again, and I can feel his erection straining beneath the front of his jeans. He’s huge. Throbbing. “I’ll know I’ve broken you completely, and only then can you have your stupid journal back. I’ll have discovered all of your secrets anyway, so it won’t even matter anymore.”

  24. 5 out of 5

    Jessica *The Lovely Books*

    So this was definitely one of those books where I couldn’t tell if I loved or hated the hero. Whit is…interesting. To say the least. Maybe interesting is the wrong choice of word. He’s intriguing and a huge jerk. It’s all part of her appeal for sure. Some of his actions just really had me shaking my head. Summer was cool. I liked that she wasn’t a pushover and knew exactly what she wanted. She was strong yet submissive. I could see why Whit was so obsessed. The story starts with the two meeting So this was definitely one of those books where I couldn’t tell if I loved or hated the hero. Whit is…interesting. To say the least. Maybe interesting is the wrong choice of word. He’s intriguing and a huge jerk. It’s all part of her appeal for sure. Some of his actions just really had me shaking my head. Summer was cool. I liked that she wasn’t a pushover and knew exactly what she wanted. She was strong yet submissive. I could see why Whit was so obsessed. The story starts with the two meeting when they are 14—then skips a few years to when they are seniors. Summer has a bunch of secrets and what kind of bully romance would his be unless she was being blackmailed with those secrets. Whit is positively the worst (but really the best, duh) and he can’t help himself. Summer is constantly on his mind. It’s okay though because Whit is constantly on Summer’s mind as well. “What would it be like, to have this boy’s heart? I wonder as I slowly drift off to sleep. Impossible, is what I tell myself. He doesn’t have one.” If you’re looking for a scorching hot read, look no further. The scenes between these two are beyond hot! It’ll be sure to melt your kindle, that’s for sure. I loved the chemistry between the two. Murphy doesn’t disappoint when it comes two making me fall in love with another one of her characters. *Thank you to the author for providing a free copy in exchange for an honest and unbiased review. All thoughts and opinions are my own.

  25. 4 out of 5

    Erin

    I received a copy of this book in exchange for an honest review My Rating: 5 Stars Spice Rating: 4.5 Eggplants HOLY SHIT, WHIT LANCASTER! I’m generally a fan of bully romances, and I love books set at rich kid schools, but I did not see this book coming. I picked it up late last night and absolutely devoured it. I mean DEVOURED. This gorgeous book is 600 pages and I tore through them like a woman possessed. I read on my breaks, in between emails, and then finished the last 200 pages as soon as I’d I received a copy of this book in exchange for an honest review My Rating: 5 Stars Spice Rating: 4.5 Eggplants HOLY SHIT, WHIT LANCASTER! I’m generally a fan of bully romances, and I love books set at rich kid schools, but I did not see this book coming. I picked it up late last night and absolutely devoured it. I mean DEVOURED. This gorgeous book is 600 pages and I tore through them like a woman possessed. I read on my breaks, in between emails, and then finished the last 200 pages as soon as I’d clocked out for the day. The bully aspect of this book was perfect. Sometimes bully romances go to far for me to truly find the character redeemable, but Whit was legitimately perfect. He put Summer down, but admired her strength and always protected her. He never went too far, in my opinion, and the chapters from his POV really helped show how conflicted he was about Summer and his growing attachment to her. My general concern with long romance books is pacing, but that was not even remotely an issue for me with Things I Wanted to Say. The chapters flew by and the tension was present throughout. I had butterflies in my stomach from the beginning to the end. Also…can we talk about Whit’s filthy mouth? Damn. DAAAAAMN. Just trust me and read it. You will not regret the choice. And then join me in begging Monica Murphy for a Sylvie and Spence story. We need it.

  26. 4 out of 5

    jordane

    “We kissed. We touched—each other's souls. We marked each other. Connected. Forever.” Things I Wanted To Say (But Never Did) is Monica Murphy's newest standalone, which follows Summer Savage and Whit Lancaster in an angsty, captivating high-school bully romance. This book is very different from any of the author's previous works that I have read, but I enjoyed it a lot! Summer and Whit were interesting characters, and I got attached to them and their crazy attraction to each other. Whit was an “We kissed. We touched—each other's souls. We marked each other. Connected. Forever.” Things I Wanted To Say (But Never Did) is Monica Murphy's newest standalone, which follows Summer Savage and Whit Lancaster in an angsty, captivating high-school bully romance. This book is very different from any of the author's previous works that I have read, but I enjoyed it a lot! Summer and Whit were interesting characters, and I got attached to them and their crazy attraction to each other. Whit was an asshole most of the time, but Summer was resilient. She stood up for herself and didn't let him walk all over her. Having his POV also made it easier to understand him, and all in all, I was under his spell. They shared MANY hot and intense moments that absorbed me page after page. The more emotional scenes between Summer and Whit were probably my favorites, as you could see how they truly felt about each other and how their mutual attraction, despite hating each other, slowly turned into love. The secondary characters also made me like this story, especially Sylvie and her friendship with Summer. However, I felt like the ending was wrapped up rather quickly, both for the couple and for the secondary characters. For example, not everything was answered about Sylvie, and she was an intriguing character from beginning to end, so maybe she will get her book. Overall, I had a great time reading Things I Wanted To Say (But Never Did). Summer and Whit's story was intoxicating! Their chemistry was off the charts, and I was hooked till the last page. *ARC kindly provided by the author and Valentine PR in exchange for an honest review

  27. 5 out of 5

    Bia

    “We kissed. We touched—each other’s souls. We marked each other. Connected. Forever.” *Before starting this review i would like to make it clear that it is a bully romance, 80% of the book is nothing romantic and can bother you, also remembering that there are triggers for sexual abuse.* ”There’s no one else for me,” he says, his blue eyes glowing. “No one else. Only you.” This book was a very different book for me, I'm not a bully-romance person, it has to be really good to make me like it and “We kissed. We touched—each other’s souls. We marked each other. Connected. Forever.” *Before starting this review i would like to make it clear that it is a bully romance, 80% of the book is nothing romantic and can bother you, also remembering that there are triggers for sexual abuse.* ”There’s no one else for me,” he says, his blue eyes glowing. “No one else. Only you.” This book was a very different book for me, I'm not a bully-romance person, it has to be really good to make me like it and this book was one of these, i was super intrigued by them in the very first pages with all the happenings, I've never read anything by this author before but this book consumed me whole, I didn't even want to sleep before it was finished. Whit Lancaster how to describe this man? he's a total asshole, brutal, messed up... but he's very hot, unlike Summer he doesn't have that life story that wins us over he's just a kid hurt by his family. Summer Savage yes this girl wons me, she is very cool, very brave and strong, she always went through all the humiliations with her head held high and her story is very touching. The couple themselves, these two exhale chemistry from the first pages, I love how they face each other, how they work together, they are like two magnets attracted to each other, this book is huge and we can see their development as a couple, and their maturing as people. I couldn't leave out their hot moments, the millions because the author didn't leave anything out, it really left me breathless several times and one of the best smut I've ever read. I wanted to talk a little about Sylvie, I loved her so much and was so disappointed in the end, i can't believe the author ruined their friendship, and i hope from the bottom of my heart that she has a book and that we can see them do it. Make up, I'm really looking forward to her dynamic with Spencer. Well i had a really good time reading this book, summerwhit are mind-blowing and as i said before i really hope there are more books.

  28. 4 out of 5

    Lana ❇✾DG Romance❇✾

    4.5 stars No review because I'm lazy but loved this one 4.5 stars No review because I'm lazy but loved this one

  29. 5 out of 5

    Jo ReadsRomance

    My favourite Monica Murphy book of 2021! This was such an addictive story. I absolutely loved every single thing about Whit & Summer. I loved how wicked Whit was and how steamy he and Summer were together. They were so kinky and I devoured their romance like there was no tomorrow. I could not put this book down. From the drama, to the level of heat, to the development of Whit’s character, I was in my happy place reading this novel. I also enjoyed a few of the secondary characters, who I am curio My favourite Monica Murphy book of 2021! This was such an addictive story. I absolutely loved every single thing about Whit & Summer. I loved how wicked Whit was and how steamy he and Summer were together. They were so kinky and I devoured their romance like there was no tomorrow. I could not put this book down. From the drama, to the level of heat, to the development of Whit’s character, I was in my happy place reading this novel. I also enjoyed a few of the secondary characters, who I am curious to know more about, especially Sylvie & Monty (I adored that man!). This was my first bully romance and I wasn’t disappointed. I felt it was a little different to anything I’ve read from Monica before and I loved the change. If you love a hero who is a little bit dark & twisted, this is a book that you should read.

  30. 4 out of 5

    Ria | Abstract ♥ Books

    ALL MY REVIEWS CAN BE FOUND ON MY BLOG: ABSTRACT BOOKS She believes she’s above it all, when no one is. They all bow to me. Eventually, she will too.” Star Rating : 4.5/5 Stars POV : Dual Cliffhanger : None Hero : Whit Heroine : Summer Pace of the story : Moderate Angst Rating : 5/10 Heat Rating : 6/10 Triggers Involved : Past Trauma , Humiliation by the H Plot Summary : The first time Summer met Whit, they were just teenagers. The boy with the cruel mouth and his s ALL MY REVIEWS CAN BE FOUND ON MY BLOG: ABSTRACT BOOKS She believes she’s above it all, when no one is. They all bow to me. Eventually, she will too.” Star Rating : 4.5/5 Stars POV : Dual Cliffhanger : None Hero : Whit Heroine : Summer Pace of the story : Moderate Angst Rating : 5/10 Heat Rating : 6/10 Triggers Involved : Past Trauma , Humiliation by the H Plot Summary : The first time Summer met Whit, they were just teenagers. The boy with the cruel mouth and his sinful kisses left an impression on her that stayed with her forever. That is until years later her whole world imploded and she was forced to move from her house. To a new school where everything was new. What she didn't expect was to meet him there. Whit Lancester has never had a great family. But At least he had one. That is until the day his family got torn apart because of Summer's mother and nothing was the same again. Now he had Summer under his hand in the new school where he was the king. A king who no one dared Contradict. And if not her mother then Summer will definitely pay for her crimes. He was going to crush her and enjoy every damn second of it. Overall Opinion : OMGGGGG. I have literally been going crazy ever since I saw this blurb plus the cover!! There is nothing I love more than a great dirty bully romance and this book had it all. I am not kidding when I say that Whit had a mean streak! The man said some crazy things but omg, I was too busy swooning to feel bad about anything 😭🥲🤣 There is also one thing that bothered me a bit. Summer was very very gullible. She just got betrayed by her loved ones and tricked by them and she just forgave them like it was nothing! I mean I get that she was innocent and sweet and had a lot of self esteem issues but still. I mean after a while I just wanted to smack her and tell her to make those people pay but she never did that. This book is a full standalone with an HEA and is one hell of a ride. Whit and Summer meet under bad circumstances which starts their tale of hate and love that spans over years. The ending of this book was simply amazing and I can't have enough of these characters! I would definitely recommend this book to all the High school bully romance lovers out there. Trust me, you all are gonna love Whit! Website | Bookstagram | Facebook Page | Newsletter

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